To My Former Boss with Fake British Accent.

Dear Mr Bademosi,

Sir, please I need you to repeat all the comments you just read to me from that so called appraisal. I have sat here listening to you grade me on my performance in the past 18 months of s***

How dare you fucking sit down in front of me to appraise me in March with a document you wrote in January? Who the hell does that without even comparisms?

You are the most biased person i have ever met.

Just a month ago you called me to your office to beg me to take over my colleagues job who was going on leave, did you know how happy I was to finally have a job on my table? Did you ever for once think that working for your organization had dulled my six years experience in all aspects of advertising and made my life hell learning digital advertising under you?

I am a full graduate of Mass communication, majored in advertising not to talk of my better kpally from brand school, tutored by good mentors in the industry who have names, awards and are highly recognized in the industry, who have spent years laboring to build me up and give me a life? How dare you?

I joined your crèche of a company hoping to learn, thinking you were one of the best but NO! i was wrong. Six months passed without me achieving anything and heaven knows how hard I tried to get out of your clutches.

How would you claim to have agency experience and you are not aware that hierarchy exist and also processes also exist? Its fucking not enough to know the processes in your head.

The HR is a numbskull with years of academic administrative experience; tell me how that correlates to being a HR who has no clue on how employees are treated. It’s so sad because I see you struggling with the biggest client you have already lost.

Imagine HR asking employees to send in their Job Description???? Who does that? What’s the internet for if you don’t know?

You hire a bunch of immature with no clue on how a real agency operates and without an inkling of what their job description looks like? You make them managers and yet they can’t even communicate with the people they manage on what accounts are coming in or which accounts are lost? So called managers don’t understand the reasons for Monday Progress/Status Meetings

How can you hire a petrochemical graduate with two masters to be your IT personnel who also doubles as TRAFFIC (he has no clue of what that means in an agency) in your agency and just when he is asked to oversee a job he calls himself PROJECT MANAGER.....Oga no be construction you dey. At least i advised you to read a little on the Job description of traffic  in an ad agency and all oga at the top could do was shout It is my company!!! Imagine things and you think it won’t reflect on how your clients see your company as a whole.

Dear Oga @ the top, I have heard your gist on how you made your last company loose clients before you ran to the UK to learn digital and you came to naija to WASH for me with UK tonations.....cheiii you catch me mugu!

The brands you work for are crying out for professionalism. How can you go for meetings with PR manager, Media Manager and your client service manager is clueless on which accounts, doesn’t even know the contact persons for the brands you handle? Wrong information is disseminated and you throw your creative team to the gallows when it is you who passed wrong information to them.

It’s not about opening an agency but understanding the job roles of everyone and believing a team can be built. It’s not about having favorites in the office and admitting to it (the height of foolishness in your own wisdom).

It’s not about you speaking phonetics to prospective clients and not selling. Your crèche inhabits the height of indiscipline and lacks technical knowhow.

Thank God for open doors and windows..... 

Yours gone forever,

Ex-staff